Chapter 8

Within Chapter 8 there were two sections that I really want to focus on in this blog:

First, I want to talk about Traditional Dating.

• The first thing I notice is that textbook states that traditional dating was predominated throughout the 1970's. Personally, when I think about traditional dating my mind goes to an earlier time earlier than the 70's. However, when I think of shows that took place in the late 70's like Three's Company, and you see the Chrissy and Janet going out on dates I would say that's pretty traditional. Or like the book mentions The Brady Bunch. In both sitcoms, like the book states, the guys comes and picks the girl up at the house, talks to mom and dad (this would be in The Brady Bunch), the girl is late, etc. The girl is then taken out on a date paid by the guy, and so on and so forth.
  
• Next, it talks about cultural variations. It goes into "coming out" parties for young individuals of different ethnicities such as bar and bat mitzvah's and quinceanera's. Jewish families celebrating their sons turning into men at the age of 13 and Hispanic families celebrating their children "coming out" at the age of fifteen. A quince starts off with a Catholic mass and then is followed by a reception with fourteen couples in the girl's court. There's a champagne toast, a traditional waltz dance, and the girl is then allowed to date boys after her quince. And as we've seen in American cultures, families having a "Sweet 16" party for their teenagers.
• The term "going steady" was common in the 1930's. Earlier, when I mentioned thinking of traditional dating as happening during an earlier time period. I thought about the 1940's to 1950's, but as the book states parts of traditional dating go back before that time period. Interestingly, the idea of "going steady" didn't live up to its name being that the meaning of this term changed after it was changed. The book stated that "going steady" allowed emotional and sexual intimacy without a long-term commitment and giving others the message that one's partner was off limits.

Secondly, I wanted to make reference and discuss a very interesting article that was placed in this chapter entitled "Why I Never Dated a White Girl"

• Basically, this article is written by a man named Lawrence Otis Graham who believed that no black man should date a white woman, and by the looks of the article probably believed that black women shouldn't date white men either. Some of the reasons he gave include the following:
  

1. Marrying outside the race demonstrates less commitment to the black race and it's causes.
   
2. There's a fear that intermarrying blacks is making a statement that black spouses are less attractive partners and therefore inferior.
3. Interracial marriages reduces the opportunity to introduce black children to positive role models and mentors within the family that can boost the child's confidence and ability to accept their own race.
   
4. Interracial marriage makes it more difficult to build a strong, prosperous black America.
5. Biracial children might turn their backs on their black identity once they realize that it's easier to live as a white person.
   
6. Today's interracial couples are a painful reminder of a 250-yeaer period in which African Americans' sexuality was exploited by white people.
   

Interracial couples experience enormous amounts of discrimination against the idea of dating one another; on both the black and white side. White partners are ridiculed by white counterparts and the same goes for blacks.

Questions: So my questions for you are as follows...

1. What do you think can be defined as "traditional dating" ?
   
2. Do you think that the term "going steady" has been transformed into something completely different from its original meaning, and if so, how do you think this happened?
   
3. Lastly, what do you think about the Graham's article? Do you think he's necessarily right or wrong for not dating outside his race? Do you think his argument is valid? If not, why? And do you think this can be applied to more than one race besides the black race? Do you think Black America has struggled to an extent that we should limit ourselves to dating within our own race? (Personally, I do not believe that we should be limited to dating only within our race, but I do think that our race has struggled enough to want to preserve our race and how it's viewed in society (through other methods though))
   

You can answer one and/or all! For the last question, hopefully everyone keeps their opinions respectful since it seems to be a very tense, controversial topic!