Raising Children: Promises and Pitfalls

To summarize the chapter 12 reading, it basically discussed parenting and the different aspects that effect the outcome of certain parenting. This was done through describing what new parents go through--parenting is learned not natural--and through describing how the mother and father experience parenting differently. The reading goes through the different psychological models of child development and how they effect the outcome of the child when paired with parenting. Then the chapter goes into parenting as it changes throughout life--the shift from caring for an infant child to caring for a teenager to providing for a boomerang child. The different kinds of families and parenting styles withing different families and cultures were addressed and how the outcome effects the development of the child--parenting as a gay/lesbian, parenting in different ethnic backgrounds such as Latino, Asian, White, and Black, and the different disciplinary actions parents often resort to.

I found the section about adult children moving back in with their parents to be most interesting. In a society that promotes independence, why are so many adults resorting to moving back home? The book mentions that "among while middle classes, men, in particular, are not moving out or are returning home because they are delaying marriage and don't feel a need to establish their own homes." Could this possibly have a residual effect on why people are postponing marriages? Because single adults who live at home with their parents may not appear as an attractive mate for someone looking for a relationship, so we postpone marriage continuing to search for someone more independent, instead of postponing marriage because we don't want to move out of our parents home.

As expressed through the media and as discussed in our book, parents have negative feelings towards finding out their child is homosexual. These feelings are often associated with feelings of guilt or shame and failure as a parent. What I ask you all is why do you think parents feel this way? The book described it as "a child who once was familiar now appears to be a stranger." What is the difference of a parent finding out that their child wants to pursue a life goal and finding out that their child is homosexual? That may be a very poor analogy for comparison but really, a child could say all their life they want to pursue one thing (possibly just to please their parents desires) and then one day decide to not pursue such goals and focus on something they truly desire. Same thing with homosexuality...in a way... finding out a fact about your child shouldn't make you feel like a failure as a parent, so why do so many parents feel this way?