Chapter 8 Blog

 

Chapter 8, Choosing Others: Dating and Mate Selection points out that most people seek out an intimate lifetime partner and mate selection is the process that gets us there. The chapter begins by describing dating as a recent phenomenon that emerged in the 20^th century and was fully established as the rule by the 1950’s. Dating is alive and well throughout the United States but seems to be on the decline amongst college students. The dating process is described by sociologists as the marriage market where people weigh the assets and liabilities of potential partners. According to the chapter there are both latent and manifest functions of dating. Some manifest functions include maturation and companionship while some latent functions included socialization and social status. The chapter elaborates upon traditional dating where there are clear scripts to follow and contemporary dating that includes more loose definitions of partnership. There is evidence for Traditional-Contemporary combinations. These combinations include proms and homecoming parties and dinner dates. The chapter outlines different ways people can meet potential mates. These avenues include personal classified advertisements, mail-order brides, professional matchmakers and speed dating. The chapter then discusses cyber-dating and its increasing popularity. The book points to homogamy, which are rules that define appropriate mates in terms of race, ethnicity, religion, age, social class, values, and other characteristics, as shaping our mate choices. However, if we reach outside of the boundaries of race, ethnicity and religion, the pool of potential partners greatly expands. From a world-wide perspective, most nations do not have the kind of open courtship system familiar to the United States. Other types of mating selection include arranged marriages and restrictions involving culture, religion or race. The chapter then points out some harms associated with dating, which are especially relevant for women. Women (and men as well) can be the victims of sexual aggression, date rape and other date related violence. The books names reasons for these issues including peer pressure and secrecy, the use of alcohol and other drugs, and the power differences between men and women. The chapter concludes by asserting that we have more choices for our mates than ever before, yet at the same time we are constrained by our culturally defined boundaries.

 

Something Interesting:

 

I found it remarkably interesting that there seems to be a great connection between money and our dating habits. For example, a cited reason for the decrease in traditional dating on college campuses was the complaint that it was just too expensive. In addition, cyber-dating and speed-dating were cited as popular because they were cheap.

 

Discussion Point

 

The topic of date rape is very sensitive especially within college campuses where there seems to be high opportunity for date rape because of factors associated with binge drinking and moving into a new environment among other things. Do you think that there has been a shift in the attitude toward acquaintance/date rape in recent years? Have there been any advances in a decrease in stigma against the victim that may help to increase victim reporting of date rape? 

-Ali Mosser