Chapter 7: Sexuality and Sexual Expression

1. Summary:

            Chapter 7 covers the topic of sexual behavior and how our sexuality it is influenced as well as how it changes throughout a person’s life. The chapter begins with discussions about sexual identity, sexual orientation, and sexual scripts. Sexual identity describes how we indentify ourselves as male or female how we express our sexuality; this includes sexual desire, sexual response, and gender roles. Sexual orientation describes sexual attraction to the same sex (homosexual), the opposite sex (heterosexual), both sexes (bisexual), or neither sex (asexual). Heterosexuality is the most common sexual orientation in America and around the world; however homosexuals exist almost everywhere as well. Transgender people are either transsexual, intersexual, or transvestites; they are often gay, lesbians, bisexual, or men and women who don’t identify themselves with any specific sexual orientation (GLBT). Two perspectives presented for what determines one’s sexual orientation are biological theories, which claim genes and sex hormones influence sexual preferences. The theory suggests specific genes cause one to be homosexual while stating that the brain structure of heterosexuals is different than that of homosexuals. However, for this theory to work, gay children would come from gay families and straight children from straight families. But there are a number of gay children from straight households and vice versa. Social constructionist theories argue that environment and culture, not biology, shape our sexual identity. Sexual scripts are individual guiding principles shaped by gender and ethnicity that dictate our attitude toward sex and how we react in sexual encounters. Some believe the sexual revolution has weakened some of the older gender roles and double standards, which have dictated sexual scripts as many women are as sexually assertive as men and premarital sex is common among both men and women.

            The next section of the chapter examines reasons people have sex. It names interpersonal reasons for having or refraining from have sex such as expressing and communicating affection, peer pressure, parental input, structural/environmental factors such as the impact of single parent households and cohabiting households. Cultural attitudes and expectations often lead children to have sex at an early age. Sex is often viewed as a way to increase intimacy and express affection in short-term relationships and viewed as a way to maintain a long-term relationship. Despite the fact that more information is available and people have more choices in regard to sexual expression young and old people alike are either deprived of information or are misinformed about important issues and the impact they may have on their health.

            Information and misinformation often comes from the following: 

•      Peers and siblings are often supportive and open about discussing sex so they are the most common sources for information among young people; however, they are often misinformed about sex and offer unreliable advice.
•      Parents are also important sources of information that may delay sexual intercourse or risky sex behavior, but children are often hesitant to discuss sex with parents because they are sometimes too embarrassed or they don’t want to disappoint them. In addition, many parents do not educate their children about sex and often are not as educated about sex as they should be; therefore, like peers and siblings, they may mislead children.
•      Religion is also thought to influence adolescents’ sexual attitudes in the sense that religious beliefs may dictate how involved someone allows himself or herself to get with sexual behavior.
•      Media and popular culture also distributes information about sex. Magazines, movies, television, and the Internet all include sex-related information/messages that influence children’s sexual behavior; but they are often misleading in that they may depict sexuality unrealistically.
•      The last source of information discussed is from sex education. Comprehensive sexuality education (CSE) has proven to be more successful than abstinence-only programs in delaying early sexual intercourse and persuade children to practice safe sex with contraceptives.

            Sex includes flirting, kissing, autoeroticism, and oral and anal sex, along with sexual intercourse. Autoeroticism is characterized by sexual excitement produced without an external stimulus; there are two common forms discussed in this chapter: sexual fantasies involving the use of mental images of sexual activities and masturbation, which encompasses providing sexual pleasure with physical stimulation. The chapter also analyzes how sex varies according to factors like age, marital status, and gender. Both boys and girls have sex for the first time between the age of 16 and 17. Interestingly since the abstinence movement began in the 1990 there has been a decrease in the number of adolescents who engage in sexual intercourse in the last decade. Men have three times as many sex partners as women. As divorce rates increase and people decide to remain single longer, premarital sex rates have increased. Women who are sexually permissive are looked down upon and judged to be unacceptable for marriage because the sexual double standard calls for women to save sex for marriage. As individuals get married, the frequency of sex for some couples decreases overtime because they place more value on their relationships and they often encounter life issues or experiences that are more important to them than lovemaking. When women reach their mid-40s/early 50s, they undergo a change known as menopause where they are no longer able to reproduce; however, they are still able to have sex and, in fact, many couples find sex more enjoyable after menopause because they have less responsibilities and stresses to worry about. As men and women reach old ages frequency of sexual activity declines significantly, but men still find sexual activity appealing while many women lose interest in sex; these gender differences can be justified by many possible reasons, such as sexual scripts and acceptable partner gaps.

            Next, the chapter discusses sexual infidelity, which encompasses actions that are considered betrayal to a committed relationship; the chapter presents many different forms of infidelity, such as extramarital sex and emotional and online infidelity. When examining statistics, it appears that men are more likely than women to engage in unfaithful behavior; however, these statistics may not necessarily be accurate as many refrain from reporting their true actions in interviews. There are many different macro and micro reasons as to why spouses and partners are unfaithful. For instance on a macro-level, financial stress, changing purposes of marriage, people living longer, increasing number of women entering the workplace, and new technology has often caused partners to act in adulterous ways. Additionally, on a micro-level, the need for emotional or sexual satisfaction, the desire for more variety, the temptation to enhance one’s ego, and even to get revenge on a partner or out of a relationship often drives people to commit unfaithful acts. Religiosity is a strong predictor of infidelity in that people who are characterized by high religiosity are less likely to engage in disloyal affairs.

            Chapter 7 ends with a discussion about gays, lesbians, and bisexuals (GLBTs) as well as the prevalence of sexually transmitted infections (STIs), HIV, and AIDS in the United States today and possible reasons for the increasing rate of STIs. In the United States, while there are still a considerable number of homophobic individuals involved in discriminating and bashing gays, a greater number than ever before have come to an ambivalent acceptance of homosexuality. Some believe GLBTs should have equal rights on various grounds and numerous institutions and TV commercials have welcomed them. Over the years, there appears to be a rise in the number of STIs and HIV infection cases. Chlamydia is the most prevalent STI in the United States and syphilis is the least prevalent. Prevalence of HIV is highest among men, African Americans, and men having sex with men. There are many assertions as to why STIs continue to spread; on a macro-level, the fact that people are uneducated about infectious diseases, immigrants forced to assimilate into America’s culture are more likely to engage in risky behaviors, and the spread of infections and poverty often contribute to the increase in the number of cases. On a micro-level, the reality that both adults and adolescents are uneducated or misinformed about sex, reluctance by many to take the precautions to protect themselves, and the secrecy that many people hold onto and refrain from revealing to others that they are infected also plays a part in the increasing rate of STIs. STIs can cause significant problems for those infected and may even result in death. When studying each gender’s body and behavior, one can infer that heterosexual women are more vulnerable to sexually transmitted infections and the consequences that stem from them. Finally, the chapter concludes by stating that people are more informed about their sexuality today, but there are also many constraints dealing with sex, sexual expression, and diseases.

2. What was interesting/what did you learn:

            I found the section about the media and popular culture being a source of information about sex very interesting. Before I read this I never really thought about how much media coverage relates to sexuality. When looking through magazines, like Cosmopolitan, you see several advertisements and articles that promote sex. Products like condoms and personal lubricants are advertised and there are several stories about someone’s sexual relationship as well as articles offering sexual advice like “75 Crazy-Hot Sex Moves”.  It does seem that with these articles and advertisements magazines are encouraging readers to have sex; premarital or not. In addition, an increasing number of young children are influenced to engage in sex early when they are exposed to inappropriate sex scenes in movies that they should not be able to watch because the movie rating system is not being enforced properly.  I also found it interesting that by blocking websites on the Internet to stop adolescents from being exposed to inappropriate content parents are actually preventing the adolescents from accessing important information that may educate them about safe sexual behavior. The Internet can be an important source of healthy information for children who need to know something about sex but don’t wish to speak to their parents, peers, or siblings about it; when parents block specific internet content from their children, they are actually preventing them from access to important information. 

3. Discussion Point:

             At the end of the section about sexual infidelity, the chapter raises two questions that I thought were worth discussing and getting input from others about. It asks, “Would you tell a co-worker, friend, relative, or family member that his or her partner or spouse is unfaithful? Would you want to be told?”

            Many times I have been put in the situation where I have seen a parent of a friend out with someone other than their spouse. Just this summer, I was at a local bar and I saw my friends stepdad with another women who wasn’t my friends mom; I really didn’t know how to approach the situation because they were acting like they were obviously more than just friends; kissing and holding hands. When he got up to go the rest room and walked by me, I said hi to him to let him know I was there and saw him. Interestingly he and the women left as soon as he went back to his table. However, I didn’t really feel comfortable saying anything to my friend about it or to her mom because I didn’t want to be called nosey or told to mind my own business. I was not sure if they would think I was trying to stir up some tension or making it up so I left it alone. But, I would want someone to tell me if they saw my boyfriend or husband in public acting intimately with another woman. I would not want to be oblivious to the fact that others may have witnessed my partner being unfaithful. I may not want to believe someone right away if they told me, but I would certainly thank them for telling me what they saw and then investigate and decide what needed to be done. I would definitely want to be informed than endure more pain and embarrassment by finding out about the betrayal and knowing that others knew before me. So my questions are: what would you do in that situation? Would you tell your friend or their mom? And would you want to be made aware if that was your partner?