Chapter 16

David Komorowski
Chapter 16 blog

Summary: Within this chapter we turn away from divorce and we turn to what happens a lot of the times after they occur—the formation of step-families and remarriages. We first look at what it is to be single again which usually involves dating or cohabitation. We then look at what a step family actually is—a house in which one of the spouses has a biological child from a previous marriage. We then see that remarriage is the most prevalent in the U.S. than anywhere else in the world. Some characteristics discussed of remarried couples are age, gender, race/ethnicity, social class, etc. More specifically the process of remarriage is broken down which includes emotional remarriage, physic remarriage, and even legal remarriage. We then take a look at a comparison between the first marriage and the remarriage. Some differences include step-siblings, distributions of stress, as well as role expectations from different people involved in the family. Before remarriage, and with good reason, people are sure to hear or know about some myths that go around involving it which is why that and stereotypes involving remarriage are also spoken about in the chapter. Step families can be very diverse and complex. Some types discussed include mother-stepfather families and father-stepmother families. Gay and Lesbian step families are then touched upon as well as characteristics which are very similar to heterosexual step families. The chapter finishes up talking about what it means to live in a step family and what can make them successful.

What I learned: In looking at the step family myths within the chapter I realized that most failed step families probably are in a bad state that they’re in because of failed or unrealistic expectations that either the parents or children have. I can imagine that most children probably have negative expectations because they do not want change in their lives but on the opposite end I believe parents “try to make the most of it” and overcompensate by smothering the child with unrealistic love. The types of remarriage (parental, emotional, legal, physic, community) make me realize just how much step families have to adjust to try and succeed in a new family with new friends and even sometimes new children. I was surprised to see that America has the highest remarriage rate of anywhere else in the world which makes me to a couple of things. But most importantly it makes me believe that people are still having faith in marriage even after the first one doesn’t work.

Questions to pose:
When looking at this chapter one thing I realized wasn’t really spoken about was the possible abuse that could happen in a step family that may not occur as much in an immediate family—for instance sexual or physical abuse from a non-biological family member. My question I pose to the class is that do you think sexual abuse is more likely to happen in step-families? Another would be how do you think feelings from a child being abused would differ between a biological and a non-biological family member.