Chapter 15 Separation & Divorce

Here are some of the things I found interesting in Ch. 15:

What really stuck out in this chapter was the "Divorce around the World" Article.

• As we all know, Divorce is much higher in the United States, but it was interesting to learn about some of the customary procedures of Divorce in other countries. Some of the countries and customs included:
  

1. The Philippines, where Catholicism is the dominant religion, divorce is still illegal. Annulment is allowed if one or both of the partners suffers psychological damage.
2. In Chile, only separation and annulment is allowed.
3. In the Muslim culture, divorce is not common. However, a husband may divorce his wife by simply repeating the sentence "I divorce thee" three times in a row in front of others. If a wife wants to divorce her husband, however, she has to go to court and plead her case. She must prove that the husband has caused some harm to her or her kids.
   
4. Egypt passed a law allowing a wife to divorce her husband as long as she was willing to give up her financial endowment and request no further financial support.
5. China has made divorce much easier. Divorce is high in urban areas such as Beijing. The rise is in divorce rates has been attributed to the adoption of Westernized ideals and culture.
   

Demographic Variables in Divorce

Some of the variables I found to be common in personal experiences within families I'm familiar with were:

Presence of Children

• As children within the family age, the chance of divorce increases. Couples are less likely to divorce when children are young because of the outweighing of perceived costs rather than benefits. Many couples stay together for the sake of their children.
  
• The chance is lowest at the age of three and younger, and highest at the age of thirteen and older.
  
• Problems that come with children aging can cause extra stress on a marriage.
  
• Boys are less likely to cause stress on their parents' relationship compared to females. Fathers play a bigger role in raising their sons and are less likely to divorce their wives because of the relationship they have with their sons.

Marriage at an Early Age

• The earlier a couple is married the higher the chance of the couple divorcing.
  
• Marrying too early is one of the biggest causes of divorce within the first five years of marriage.
  
• Marriages where couples marry under the age of 18 are at the highest risk of failing.
  

Premarital Pregnancy and Childbearing

• Marriages where children come before the actual marriage are at a higher risk for divorce than marriages without
  

Child Support

• Almost half of men who divorce never support their children after their marriage has ended.
• Women make up more than 80 percent of custodial parents.
  
• Mothers with custody are three times as likely to be poor than men are.
• Custodial parents received on average between 3700 and 3800 in child support in the year 2000.
  

Visitation

• When a parent, men in most cases, has partial custody over the child they are likely to care for the child completely or at least half of the child's expenses (guesstimate) through child support.
  
• Parents who do not have custody of the child are less likely and almost never pay for their children's child support b/c they feel:
  

1. Abandoned by the family therefore decreasing their role within the child's life
   
2. Overworked and have too many financial responsibilities in addition to their child's needs. They may pay for the family they remarry into or if they are suffering financially may not have the means to pay for their children at all.
   
3. Kicked out from the family or by his wife and in result use child support as a way to control his ex-wife.
   
4. Not obligated to take care of the family due to immaturity.
   

Enforcement

• Laws have been passed in order to enforce the payment of child support. One law being the Child Support Enforcement Amendments that require states to withdraw owed child support from a spouses paycheck.
• Another law called the Family Support Act of 1988 gives a judge the right to judge child support on a case by case basis (ie if a father is unable to make child support payments).
  
• Courts can enforce an award be made when a father's finances increase.
  
• Fathers that have good relationships with their children's mothers are more likely to make child support payments and make them on time regularly
  
• Mothers who have good relationships with their child's father are more likely to receive court awarded rewards
  
• Many believe that enforcing these laws will result in a decrease of the poverty rate amongst single mothers.
  

Are Men Deadbeat Dads?

• In white households the fathers are more likely to be active and involved within the child's life. They are also in better financial situations allowing them to support their families more often.
  
• In black families the income is less than fifty percent.
  
• Many fathers don't agree with the final decisions made between them and their spouses. They also feel taken advantage of by their ex-wives.
  

Questions:

1. What do you think defines a so called "deadbeat dads"? Are there multiple aspects to this definition or is it simply someone who doesn't pay child support?
   
2. What are your thoughts on divorce within other countries. Do you think these countries should allow divorce or are the laws that are in place now effective or fair?
   
3. Do you think if a father feels betrayed he has the right to take it out on his wife or fight the question of whether or not he should pay child support? This ultimately affects the child. How do you feel about this?
4. Lastly, do you think a couple should wait until the child grows up to divorce like most couples do? Or do you think it's misleading for the couple to do so because the child will grow up thinking his/her parents are staying together?