Chapter 3: The Family in Historical Perspective

1. Summary

       Chapter 3 looks at historical events and periods that have influenced the family today and how many of these events have changed the dynamics of the American family. It begins with a discussion about colonial families and how they were structured, what the husbands and wives roles were, what childhood was like, and how sexual relations were looked upon. Colonial families were often hard-working nuclear units that performed a variety of functions. Every family member worked to contribute to the family’s success. As head of the family, husbands were the breadwinners and wives were expected to obey their husbands, be domestic and care for the children. Children were to be obedient and expected to do chores at very young ages. While education was important to colonial families, boys usually received more formal education than girls whose training basically involved domestic skills as they were expected to be homemakers.  In spite of the fact that sexual relations were expected to take place only between husbands and wives, illegitimate births and adultery were not uncommon occurrences. However, strict customs to prevent premarital intercourse were practiced like bundling, where couples would sleep fully dressed together but be separated by a wooden board. This section also explains how family structures and practices differed among social classes and in geographic regions. For instance the marriage of first cousins was common among the upper class to expand family businesses while children in many middle class families were encouraged to branch out from the family to find financial security. In addition, family life was different in the villages of northern colonies than it was on farms and plantations in the south.

        The next section examines the experiences of American Indian, African American, and Mexican American families as they migrated to North America. The structure of the American Indian family was extremely diverse. Men and women married at young ages and parents sometimes arranged marriage. Families were often small as there were high infant and child death rates. In some American Indian tribes matrilineal descent was common. The women were more powerful than most colonial women; they were the property owners and passed it on to their daughters. Sadly, the American Indian culture was slowly destroyed by disease and massacre, or interference from the American government and missionary activities, as well as because of marriages to non-Indian individuals. African American families experienced the cruelty of slavery; Men and women could not marry legally and family members were often separated from each other by their owners.  Fathers had little power because they were controlled by their masters, so mothers often acted as head of the household. Women had to work exhausting hours often doing both field work and domestic chores for the owner’s household as well as taking care of their own family’s needs. Children were forced to work at extremely young ages, making them very vulnerable to abuse and injuries. After slavery was abolished, African American couples were permitted to make their marriages formal and wedding celebrations became celebratory events. When the United States government took over most of the land many Mexicans lived on their families endured many injustices and hardships. They lost their land and financial security through exploitation by the U.S. government and many men had to take manual labor jobs for very little pay. Despite the hardships, family relationships were top priority for Mexican American families.  The practice of compadrazgo was a key factor in the family structure with extended families of several generations providing assistance and support to family members. Men held all the power as head of household while women were forbidden to have sexual relations until they were married and were expected to be homemakers and mothers. Women were also expected to limit their social relationships to family and female friends. Childhood was harsher for girls than boys as like their mother a girl’s social life was limited to relationships within the home.

       Industrialization and immigration had a big impact on the American family. In the late eighteenth and early nineteenth century, gender greatly determined family roles. With the cult of domesticity view, women were housewives while men were the breadwinners. “Good woman” were expected to possess four cardinal virtues: piety, purity, submission, and domesticity. With the turn of the twentieth century family dynamics began to change as couples appeared more loving as they were free to make more personal choices and experienced more financial security. Middle class children began to experience adolescence rather than jumping right to playing adult roles like they were forced to in the past; they were free to play and no longer had to work to help support the family. This was not necessarily true for all working-class families, as children were forced to work at young ages to help the family survive. Immigrants, who came to the United States during the late 1800s, advanced the Industrial Revolution by taking up strenuous jobs at very low-wages. Along with the economic exploitations that immigrants underwent, they experienced poor housing condition; many were crammed into densely populated cities, being forced to live in tight spaces such as closets of homes. With these poor crowded living conditions came the spread of many diseases and a great amount of discrimination.

       The Great Depression also had a dramatic influence on many families, especially African Americans and both the working-class and poor. Many experienced the strains of being laid off, such as hunger, forced to make major sacrifices like husbands leaving the family to find jobs, and in general families fell apart when tension rose and many suffered from depression due to the lose of status. Women often had an easier time finding jobs, but they worked for significantly lower wages. In addition, World War II changed the work roles of the family even more. As many men were drafted, there became a demand for workers. Employers began to hire women for jobs that had previously only been held by men. Black women were finally recognized with the working class and able to earn fair wages. Unfortunately, although the war might have positively affected the economic independence of women, it had a detrimental effect on the family as a whole. Divorce rates skyrocketed and many children were unsettled by the changes their father’s return caused; many did not even know their father and many had anger towards their father for leaving. Just as in every new time period, the family once again changed after the war. Women’s economic independence was lost as the returning male veterans replaced their jobs and they were encouraged to become, yet again, full-time homemakers. To make up for lost times, birth rates escalated as couples began rapidly reproducing. Babies produced at this time were known as baby boomers. Many families wanted to escape the poor city life conditions and moved into the suburbs. Despite popular culture’s attempt to depict the golden fifties, many of the accounts exclude the fact that families experienced many problems and had less freedom of choice compared to today.

       The chapter ends by examining many changes that the family has encountered since the 1960s. Some changes include increases in the divorce rate, number of women receiving higher education, single-parents, and an increase in the number of families with both the husband and wives working outside the home. There has also been a loosening up of the defined gender roles of men being breadwinners and women being homemakers.

2. What was interesting/what did you learn:

       I found the section about World War II and its impacts on the family very interesting. I never really thought about how much war can affect divorce rates and how it would feel to have a parent drafted into the military. The thing that really caught my attention is how war sometimes changes the mental state of men so much that they are very hard to live with. I can’t even imagine coming back to my family sane after fighting in a war and witnessing so many cruel things. I have many friends who have fought or are currently in the service and some of them came back from Iraq different then they were before. Many marines develop post-traumatic stress disorder and often struggle when trying to rejoin their families and pick up where they left off. As a husband in war often puts strain on the couple’s relationship, it also affects their children. Many children who are born while their father is at war do not even know who their fathers are so when they return they often are frightened to adjust with living with a man who is a stranger in their eyes. In addition some children cannot accept the fact that their father left their family to fend for themselves when he was away and they become distance from their father when he returns. This puts a strain on the father because he returns with little affection with his children and little control over them.

       After reading this section, I understand that families often must endure many hardships and undergo many changes when a family member is sent to war. We hear about deaths of soldiers all the time on the news and I always think about how much that affects the family, but I never really thought about how much the family is affected by other situations such as the readjustment stage when one returns home after serving time away at war.

3. Discussion Point:

       As I was reading the section about the Great Depression and how it affected the family, I started thinking about how similar it is to what many families are experiencing today. Over the past few years, family roles have changed significantly as our economy has weakened and caused many people to lose jobs as businesses struggle or are forced to shut down. My family is a valid example of a family that has undergone a lot of change similar to the kind of change characterized by the Great Depression. Ever since I was born, my mother was a stay at home mom fulfilling all the domestic work around the house while my dad owned his own home construction business. But as the housing industry crashed, my dad unfortunately was forced to give up his dream business and found himself out of work. My mom had to, for the first time in twenty years, join the workforce; however, like during the Great Depression she did not work for a very high wage. Many husbands are experiencing the same kind of struggle today as men during the Great Depression who struggled with the feeling of losing their power and status when they lost their jobs. When my dad found himself out of work and had no luck with job searching, his mental state diminished significantly; he became depressed over the fact that he had no way of providing for the family and feared losing everything. He distant himself from his friends and just wanted to be alone until he found a job and gained his status as the breadwinner again. My questions are: could today’s weakened economy and its impact on the family be the start of another Great Depression? Will the rise in unemployment rates and their negative effects on the family end soon or will it take years? Has this economic downturn caused the rise in divorce rates and a change in gender roles from the traditional, with women as homemakers and men as breadwinners?